quote of the day

(Little e accompanied me to the dentist. He's due for his first checkup and I thought seeing Mama get her teeth cleaned would show him what he could expect.)

HYGIENIST: So Elian, do you have a special toothbrush you clean your teeth with?

ELIAN: I use an electric toothbrush.

HYGIENIST: (Sounding surprised) An electric toothbrush?

ELIAN: JUST KIDDING!

next stop, world cup

Watch the kid in the blue hat -- just who IS this boy's mother?

26 days and counting

until Walker on the Green. (See second to last paragraph, last sentence.)

If you haven't booked your room at Hotel Hernandez to experience Ed's hole (giggle, giggle), hurry, we're booking up fast.

the post-pee interview

like father, like son

shadow giggle (aka: i peed my pants)

quote of the day

MAMA: Buddy, Papa's birthday's coming up. What should we get him?

ELIAN: I know what we can get him, um (thinking) ... let's get him a gun!

MAMA: No, guns are not nice -- they hurt people.

ELIAN: (Thinking) Hmmm, well then let's get him a marble run!

quote of the day

ELIAN: Papa, can I borrow your cookie?

MAMA: Elian, you know, when you borrow something, you have to give it back. When you ask someone if you can have something, you don't have to give it back.

ELIAN: Papa, can I have your cookie?

quote of the day

PAPA: What do you want for breakfast, buddy?

ELIAN: A waffle.

PAPA: I'm afraid there's only half a waffle in our freezer.

ELIAN: Maybe Mama will save the day.

he's got a knack for naming

There's a squirrel that visits the tree outside Elian's bedroom window that he has lovingly named Lollipop. This morning, when he woke up, he saw a bird on that same tree. His new bird friend. When Ed asked him if the bird had a name, Elian replied that his name is Eskimo Jello.

Eskimo Jello. What an awesome name for the girl rock band I'm going to start one day.

quote of the day

PAPA: (While tying Elian's shoe) Why did you un-tie your shoe?

ELIAN: Because...I don't know...I'm having some shoe issues.

tree hugger tip

So about 10 years ago, Ed used to buy this earth-friendly dishwashing liquid that I hated. It never produced any kind of lather so it felt like you weren't actually washing your dishes. It's hard for me to get behind a green product if it doesn't do what it's supposed to do. I was convinced that was as good as earth-friendly dishwashing was going to get, so I had been reluctant to try any new ones. But now, with my mission to be more green, I'm pleased to report, I've found better options.

I had started with this lovely bottle of Method. Isn't it pretty? And ahhh, the cucumber scent -- intoxicating! But as much as I love the sleek, clean design of the bottle, the functionality wasn't very great. It was really hard to get the soap out (and yes, I did squeeze it). And truthfully, I had heard enough complaining from the husband. So I had to say goodbye to my little Method friend. Sniff.


But then I tried Seventh Generation. It's sudsy, it smells good and the bottle works like a dream (but doesn't look as pretty as Method sitting on the countertop). According to the bottle (and why would a bottle lie to a person?): "If every household in the U.S. replaced just one bottle of 25 oz. petroleum based dishwashing liquid with our 25 oz. vegetable based product, we could save 81,000 barrels of oil, enough to heat and cool 4,600 U.S. homes for a year!" So go on and get yourself some why don't you! You can find it at Target. And for those of you with dishwashers, they do make automatic dishwasher powder and gel too.



And speaking of Seventh Generation, I've also been using their lavender eucalyptus laundry soap and me likes. I admit, I thought I'd miss the fresh laundry smell on my clothes. But once I came to terms with the fact that clean doesn't have a smell, I got over it. And the clothes do still smell fresh when they've been washed in this soap, it's just a little more subtle than most laundry soaps.

sweet georgia brown

Saturday we saw the Harlem Globetrotters at the Target Center. My friend sent me a link for half-priced tickets so the tickets themselves were only $15. But by the time Ticketmaster tacked on all their "services" the three tickets came to $75. I even got to pay for the privilege of printing the tickets off our home printer. Thank you Ticketmaster for all of your gracious service to humanity!

We decided to forego the special event parking and take the bus downtown. On the ride there, a nice man gave Elian $2 to buy himself some popcorn (actual price: $3.50). This wasn't the first time a complete stranger gave him cash -- the kid's a money magnet!

The Globe Trotters sure have changed since I remember seeing them as a child. First of all, the advent of the cordless mike has introduced dialogue to the routine and yelling, lots and lots of yelling. But I'm happy to report the bucket-full-of-confetti schtick is still alive and well.

We ate at NBA City before the game. And if you ever have a hankering for some mediocre-quality overpriced food, run, don't walk, to your nearest NBA City! Seeing Elian compare his hand and foot size to that of an NBA star made the low-par food all worthwhile.

And in case you were wondering, the Globetrotters won! After a very close and suspense-filled game to the Washington Generals that included a traumatic injury and triumphant recovery by Special K! Hooray Globetrotters!

tourettes quote of the day

"CANTON VILLAGE! CANTON VILLAGE!"

(This is the name of a Chinese restaurant we pass on our way for lunch with Papa downtown.)

and the oscar goes to...

quote of the day

(Background: When I picked up Elian from playschool he was running around with this toy that looked like it could've been magnets stuck together.)

MAMA: What was that thing you were running around with at playschool?

ELIAN: It was a gun.

MAMA: A gun?

ELIAN: Not the kind you shoot with. Just the kind you run around with.

batter up!

We bought the boy a tee-ball tee and bat yesterday. He appears to be a natural. I was shooting the video from the outfield until I got a line drive in my left inner thigh.

quote of the day

Background: Lately Elian's been bringing home drawings from playschool he says are of "beautiful carpet." Beautiful carpet drawings involve color -- lots and lots of color. Yesterday he was outside with his sidewalk chalk. He started to make deliberate line strokes in many different colors -- very reminiscent of his "beautiful carpet" drawings.

PAPA: What are you drawing, buddy, beautiful carpet?

ELIAN: No, it's an abstract.

quote of the day

The significance of the following exchange is compounded by the fact that Ed already is a little uncomfortable with the whole Santa Clause deception:

ELIAN: (Going through bag of tennis balls Norman got for Christmas) These balls have a Petsmart sign on them. Why did Santa get these balls at Petsmart?

PAPA: He must be a savvy shopper.

ELIAN: Where did Santa get my marble run?

PAPA: (Blink. Blink.) I don't know.

and one last april fool's day joke for good measure

"Mama, I ate Target."

I go upstairs to kiss him goodnight and find that he and Papa have zipped Target into his PJs. Only I think he forgot what he was supposed to say then because there was a long silence while I dramatized my concern over the fact that he had just swallowed his Ugli Doll.

And then, finally. APRIL FOOLS!

quote of the day

I wish there was an M&M fairy who would sprinkle M&Ms around on the ground. And then, we could eat them up like birds.

chalk one up for mama and papa

"Elian, do you know we won't have the computer tomorrow. It has to go in for service. It will be gone for a few weeks."

(Tearing up very quickly) "What about pinball?!?!?!"

APRIL FOOLS!!!!!!

somebody call guinness!

Lately the little man hasn't been napping too much. But it's not like he hasn't needed them. Lately, he's been acting a little, I don't know, shall we say, CRAZY? Very over-tired, going from slap-happy silly to an emotional wreck at the drop of a hat -- the kind of craziness where he's slapping himself in the face then crying over the fact that he just drew the perfect R. No, really. That and he's drinking a lot of juice.

So today when I put him upstairs for his nap, and he told me he didn't want to take one, I wasn't surprised, but I really didn't feel like arguing, so I just told him to play quietly for a while. I went downstairs and could hear him playing with his train track over the monitor. Then, in the next minute, I heard some grunting, then, I heard some snoring.

Now this wouldn't be blogworthy other than the fact that never in his three years of life has he been a nap initiator. He's never just fallen asleep while watching TV or while doing anything for that matter. But he got in his bed, pulled the covers over him, and the BOY FELL ASLEEP!

In other news, we just told the boy it was April Fools Day. Now for the past 15 minutes we've heard:
"I don't like milk. APRIL FOOLS!!!"
"I don't like yogurt parfaits. APRIL FOOLS!!!!"
"I don't like elephants. APRIL FOOLS!!!!"
"I don't like the sun. APRIL FOOLS!!!!"

Luckily we told him right before bed. It's very unfortunate that tomorrow is no longer April Fools.

tourettes quote of the day

(While eating lunch at the mall.)

DOWNWARD DOG!