"cavin" by a lake

Elian and I spent a few days at a cabin with most of my family and his cousins. And Ed spent four glorious nag-free days with his pals Tony Soprano and D-money.

Here are some pictures. Had Ed been there, they'd be much better. Damn it, they're still going in sideways. What the hell?















(please note the civilized child.)

quote of the day

Today Elian had a substitute babysitter (his usual sitter's sister). The following conversation took place shortly after I returned home from work.

Mama: "How did things with Emily go?"

Elian: "Good. (Pause). (Pause). I touched her boobies!"

the people on the bus

Today Elian and I took the bus downtown to have lunch with Papa. Since Ed takes the bus to work every day, naturally the ride was much anticipated by the little man.

For the duration of the short ride, he sat so still in my lap with a little nervous smile glued across his face. Much to his chagrin, the people on the bus were not going up and down, nor was the bus driver saying, "Move on back."

We met Papa at our usual place -- the lower level of Macy's. On the way there, Elian shared his enthusiasm for the bus with a woman trying on shoes, "I rode the bus!" For lunch, Ed and I got our usual (sushi for me, a salad concoction w/chicken and walnuts for Ed). But this time, Elian passed on the macaroni and cheese a la Macy's and instead opted for a deluxe, double-decker peanut butter and jelly sandwich. (One day, the boy is totally going to turn into either PB&J or a waffle -- I swear!)

We finished our lunch and on the way out of Macy's Elian said, "Look, it's Papa on the TV!" (He likes to point out when people look like Mama or Papa.) According to Ed, he half expected to look up and see, and I quote, "A big fat guy with a bald head." But it was in fact Papa and Elian both on the security camera. Following that discovery, there was much waving and a bit of hopping.

I think the ride home on the bus was a little more exciting for the boy as he sat in the seat next to me and moved about enjoying the freedom from the usual restraint of the carseat.

And that, my friends, was our trip on the bus. Stay tuned for our next installment when Elian and Mama take a trip up north to stay at a cabin on a lake with Grandma, Grandpa and the cousins.

another photo brought to you by ed's new lover, er, i mean lens

(There's just no stopping him with this new lens. He loves it so much. In fact, I think I caught him tongue-kissing it the other day.)

harvest day

A while back Elian planted a bean seed in the class we took together. The transplant from the styrofoam cup was a success and the little bean plant continued to thrive.

Yesterday I noticed there was a huge bean growing on it. Elian was so excited I thought he was going to pee his pants. And there's a good chance that he did. He insisted that he eat his bean RIGHT NOW. So I got some water boiling because that's what you do when you don't have a microwave. And we cooked that bean to the most perfect green crunchiness.

When he tasted it, you would've thought he was eating some sort of delectable chocolatey ice cream treat or something. Mmmmmmm! So I'm thinking when/if his enthusiasm (or tolerance) for vegetables dwindles, we may have to build a green house.

And fill it with little styrofoam cups.

happyhappyjoyjoy

best. things. ever. volume 6

• The way you pronounce air conditioning: air decision.
• How you give serious consideration, before every car ride, to what ball should accompany you.
• How you say banana: bee-anna.
• Our front-porch picnics for lunch every day, or, as I like to call them, our meetings of the minds.
• How one day you can love, love, love the tornado slide, and the next day, not so much -- ditto for ants.
• How you will still plant a big kiss on a random tree every once in a while.
• When you sing the theme to "Wonder Pets" -- how even though you don't have the words right, it still makes sense.
• How you ask papa if you can do something and if he says no, you ask me and vice versa -- and you're only two (we're in trouble).
• How you'll run and get a ball or some sort of pick-me-up for a distressed character in a book we're reading.
• The way you re-enact every video of you we watch on the computer.
• The look on your face when you present your book selections for the evening.
• The fact that you laugh hysterically at my bad jokes (one of your favorites: what do you want for lunch? peanut butter and jelly or peanut butter and jelly?)
• When you return beaming from a walk with papa and puppy with a dandelion you picked for me.

quote of the day

(After checking himself out in the mirror.)

"I look like a small man."

he's soaking in it

The husband had a genius idea to let the little man "help" with the dishes. Turns out this kitchen-sink amusement can last for about an hour. It's like he's in a little dish-washing trance. It's quite awesome.

And about time the boy starts earning his keep.

oh look, it's a letter from our friends!

Yesterday little e got a letter from his cousin Izzy in the mail. Guess what she sent him. LITTLE TINY BALLS! Hooray! Thank you, Izzy for watching your little cousin's back. (Again with the sideways pictures -- what gives?)

hot dog

quote of the day

As I pushed him on the swing at the park, he watched as the workers cut down the tree and fed it in to the mulcher. After seeing the mulcher spit the tree parts into the truck, he said this:

"It's kinda like puke."

Then this, his trademark quote:
"Put a ball in there be funny."

quote of the day

Looking at magazine cover featuring Tony Soprano in checkout lane of supermarket.

"That looks like grandpa!"

little chief

quote of the day

(After being invited to see the fish in the neighbor's pond.)
Papa: Do you want to see the fish in the pond, buddy?
Elian: Maybe you can throw them?!?!?

The throwing fish guys in Seattle have definitely made an impression.

hernandez family vacation 2007

The Hernandez Family Vacation 2007 was a success! The little man was awesome and proved himself a boy of the biggest kind. We didn’t bring a lot of toys for him – just a few marbles, some books and his Little Tiny Soccer ball. But he managed to keep himself amused everywhere we went -- building half-and-half towers at breakfast, playing ice-bucket basketball, laughing hysterically as he watched mama’s undies tumble around in the washing machine like it was a funny TV show -- even though he missed his puppy and his toys back home like crazy.

We really loved Seattle and Vancouver and if it weren’t for a guaranteed life of bad hair days, I could see living in either place. Rather than bore you with the play by play, I’ll bore you with the photos! Let me know if you want to see more (and I mean, really, who wouldn't?) we have about 8 bazillion. Don't ask me why three of the following photos are on their sides -- I swear I wasn't drunk when I took them.

Space Needly goodness




Seattle has a lot of hills. Thankfully, the boy only weighs 28 pounds.




And what's a trip to Seattle without a picture of this guy? The boy loved him some fish flinging. That night, over a delicious dinner of linguine and clam sauce, we couldn't resist yelling, "ONE EMPTY CLAM SHELL!!" before throwing it into the bowl.




A family rock toss into Lake Washington. Kudos to our photographer Dan who captured the rocks mid-flight -- hello, National Geographic?!?!?




I smell a Christmas card (except for the bad-hair part).




Bainbridge Island ferry ride.




Lollipop bribe on Bainbridge Island Ferry.




The drive to Vancouver. (Not only did friends loan us their VW Passat, but also their handy-dandy GPS system. It only took minutes before Elian was chiming in on our jokes to the voice directing us where to go: "Look out for that car...right there." And by the end of the trip, he had her voice to a tee, "recalculating".)




You may want to think about rinsing that hotel ice bucket next time. You don't know where it's been.




Two monkeys in Stanley Park.




Vancouver Aquarium (Rainforest).




A teeny-tiny train ride through Stanley Park.




Checking out the Beluga whales.




One of the rare moments at mealtime when he wasn’t requesting doodle-pro drawings of things puking (swans, fish mongers, mama puking on Elian – dear god, I hope this is just a stage).




The Capilano Suspension Bridge.




That's a long way down.




A big-ass tree.




And last, but not least, two geeks.



Stay tuned. I have movies too!

gone fishing

The Hernandezeseseses are off on a family vacation to Seattle and Vancouver. Stay tuned for exciting stories of travel and ball spottings.

quote of the day

(Said to random mom on the way out of our class this morning.)
"Good-bye. I love you!"

first report card

"Elian is a quiet student. He follows directions well. He enjoys parallel play in the toddler and block areas. He follows directions well and will pick up one toy and come to do a puzzle at puzzle time."

quote of the day

(While remembering our Art-a-Whirl experience.)

Elian: What's Art mean?

Mama: Um, it could be a painting...or maybe a drawing...

Papa: Or, maybe a sculpture...

Mama: Or, it coud even be the way you dance in your own way...

Elian: Or, maybe my Doodle Pro...

and now, a word from our sponsor

bad boys, bad boys, whatchya gonna do?

Today we went to an open house at our police precinct. Here are some of the highlights:




(Boy, those fireman are going to be pissed when they find somebody changed all their hose settings.)

Other highlights included: petting a police horse, seeing a dog from the K9 unit open a car door with his nose (note to self: must teach Norman that trick) and meeting Mcgruff the crime dog (Michael, they could've used you).

quote of the day (yesterday)

(To the cashier at Starbucks)
"I got a new Chuck-it!"

happy birthday puppers!

Today the best puppy in the world turned eight years old. And to celebrate, we all had a cupcake. Now you see it, now you don't.



And from the makers of "How to eat a donut", the much anticipated, "How to eat a cupcake." (In case I ever had a doubt the boy was my kid, this pretty much erases it.)



Elian bought Norman a Chuckit Junior for his birthday. Now he can chuck the ball for Norman alongside Papa in the morning. We tried it out and it quickly evolved into a game of Chuckit basketball. I'd include a clip but this entry is already a bit clip-heavy. Maybe another day.

And since tomorrow is Papa's birthday, much like he decided it would be a great idea to buy Uncle Mike a blue ball for his birthday, Elian decided it would even be a better idea to buy Papa a ball for his birthday. I mean, really, who doesn't need a ball? So he picked out a beautiful purple ball for Papa and we brought it home to wrap it (ie: stuff it in a birthday bag). I stressed to him that this was a SURPRISE for Papa and mum's the word...his birthday's not until tomorrow, blah, blah, blah. We hid it in the closet with the idea that Elian would present it to Ed tomorrow when he woke up. When I returned from work today, Elian insisted that he try Papa's ball out or "play with it a little bit," as he called it. I let him put a few bounces in before we went for our walk, then we put it back into the closet for hiding. Later, when Ed came home from work, Elian could barely contain himself. Ed wasn't in the door two seconds when Elian blurted out, "Papa, I have a SECRET... I have a present for you... come see it...IT'S A BALL!!!!!"

Guess who's now sleeping with the purple ball? I'll give you a hint, it's not Ed.

hoops

Apparently the Little Tikes hoop isn't challenging enough.

fast forward 15 years

This hits frighteningly close to home.

he was born a poor black child

Some nights when I put little e to bed, I feel I am living that scene from the Jerk. You know, the one where Steve Martin is about to leave and he picks up random objects as he goes, "All I need is this ashtray...and this paddle game. The ashtray and the paddle game and that's all I need...And this remote control."

Before he goes into his crib, there's always some sort of negotiation about what he can and can not bring into his crib. (Right now he has two soccer balls in his crib with him (he gave up his bunny and his hippotamus to make room for those) plus a few stuffed animals for good measure. If it were up to him, he'd have the entire contents of his toy box in there with him. I don't really care if he plays with the toys before falling asleep, it's more a matter of safety and space logistics -- or a soccer ball rolling into his head the moment he falls asleep.

quote of the day

"Look Mama, I drooled an exclamation point."

now that it's nice out, think we'll ever go inside again?

i gotta hand it to the kid, he doesn't give up.

newsflash!

I'm grossly underpaid at one of my jobs.

quote of the day

This happened yesterday on a walk, but since I already had a QOTD yesterday, let's pretend it happened today.

Background: Lately whenever Ed and Elian are sharing a special father/son moment, Ed says, "Just two handsome dudes (INSERT ACTIVITY HERE)" For example: just two handsome dudes brushing their teeth...just two handsome dudes playing chugga chugga choo choo, you get the idea.

So yesterday, Elian and I were taking Norman on a Lemon Ding-dong (deserving of its own blog entry), when Elian said:
Just one handsome dude and one handsome Mama walking puppy.

quote of the day

Background: Lately Elian's been requesting to drink his beverage "like a big boy with crazy straw." Sadly, whilst draining the pasta I made tonight, I dumped the scalding hot water in the sink where said crazy straw rested. The whimsical loop the straw made was no longer and what was left was a not-so-crazy straw -- more like a straw with a bad case of scoliosis. Then, as usual, Elian sat down to dinner and asked for the straw. After Ed explained to Elian that he hadn't seen the crazy straw, I chimed in to say I hadn't seen it either. To which he replied:

"Maybe Lempi stealed it."


P.S. Lempi just turned 93 a few weeks ago.

best. things. ever. volume 5

• How you say "for" instead of "to" like "I want to give it for Mama." And even in very subtle instances like together (forgether).
• How your enthusiasm for finding Tiny Little Balls has not died -- nor does it seem it ever will.
• Your freakishly accurate memory.
• Your freakishly heightened sense of perception (your ability to spot a ladybug, Tiny Little Ball or flea while being pushed in stroller -- "I SEE SOMETHING!! I SEE SOMETHING!! DON'T ROLL ME!!!")
• How happy, to the point of giddy, you get when I let you make cookies with me.
• How you say "windshield wipers" ("whimper wipers").
• The fact that you still call the stairs "dotes" even when you know the proper word, because Papa and I like it.
• How when I say something you really like the sound of, you say, "What Mama say?" just so you can hear it again.
• Hearing at 6:30 in the morning for the past couple weeks "THE SUN WAKED UP PAPA...THE SUN WAKED UP MAMA... I sleeped like a big boy!"
• How you lick my face like a puppy dog.

d money

For the past week, we've been taking care of my brother's dog, Duncan -- or D Money (the rap name we've given him along with his partner in crime, P Diddy, aka: Puppy Dog).

Ed and I, and especially Elian, really enjoy Duncan's visits and we love him as if he were our own. And since Norman grew up with Duncan, he's the only dog Norman will really tolerate. Duncan is without a doubt, the most mellow dog on the planet. If he could talk, I imagine he'd start every sentence with "Dude." I also imagine that he does bong hits when we're not looking. Duncan is a cuddler which is the complete opposite of Norman. Norman is more like a cat. He likes to be pet on his terms only. Not like Duncan who will curl up on the bed with you, inching closer and closer to you any chance he can get -- if he's not already lying on your head.

Elian is not used to having a real dog around the house. He's used to having his cat-dog Norman who he can't pet. So when Duncan's here, he is all about the cuddles. "I want to cuddle with Duncan... I want to give Duncan a hug... I love Duncan...." And Duncan just sits there and takes it as Elian wraps his arms around his enormous neck and rests his head on his back. Sometimes I feel bad that our little boy doesn't have a dog he can hug (or pet). I also feel bad that Norman has to hear Elian proclaim his love for Duncan at least four times a day. But Norman's neurosis is what makes him so darn lovable.

Some other of Duncan's endearing qualities have to do with his love (or obsession) with food. Around 3:30 you can expect to hear him impatiently pushing his food dish around waiting to be fed. And then there's the way he digs up rocks at the river and pulls them out with his mouth as if he's going to eat them whole.

Here is a picture I took of the two furry friends looking into the kitchen (it looked much better in real life). I imagine this is what they were thinking.

Norman: "For the love of god, woman, when is my next walk?!?"

Duncan: "Dude, where's my food? I've got a serious case of the munchies."

abcs

I wish I'd learn to shut my big fat pie hole when I take these little clips. I also wish I'd learn how to post to YouTube so the audio would sync with the video.

diagnosis: tapeworm

Ever since the Miracle Waffle Incident, the boy's appetite has been insatiable. This morning he ate 1 1/2 waffles and about 15 minutes afterwards, he wanted more waffles. Then came the snack requests after snack requests. After an ugly moment of crying and block throwing, I suggested some milk. He slammed it down and asked for more. Then he said, "I'm better, Mama. I'm nice now."

I write this now as he devours the egg I just made him -- the one he requested the minute he woke up from his nap. I was a bit skeptical, but now seeing him eat it like it was his first meal of the day, I'm glad I did.

The good news about this virus he had: We may have successfully (and painlessly) phased out the Nuk. He had no appetite for the Nuk while he was sick, so now we're riding the Nuk-free wave and we'll see where it goes.

The bad news about this virus (aside from the 8 miles of landfill we produced with poopy diapers): There has been a Calliou relapse.

anything and everything

Yesterday Elian was about 85% back to normal. I think since he was feeling better, and no longer confined to his prison that was the couch, he wanted to do everything in the world.

We made a track for his cars. We made a ramp for his cars. We made a ramp out of blocks for his cedar balls. We went to the park and kicked the ball back and forth and hunted for Tiny Little Balls. We played basketball. We made a train track. And this was all before 1 p.m.

Oh, and he also had a very blue lollipop.

for the non-believers

While I was away on Schulz Girls' Getaway Weekend 2007, I picked up a packet of cedar balls for Elian. Karen, Lisa and Mom laughed at me and didn't believe me when I said that out of all the gifts I brought home from Arizona, the cedar balls would be the hit. Now that our little guy is finally feeling better, here's the proof:


Later that same morning:

a poopy week. literally.

I arrived home last Sunday late night after an enjoyable Schulz Girls Weekend. I missed my fellas like crazy and was sad that I wouldn't be able to see little e until the morning.

Turns out, I got to see him sooner than I thought I would since he woke up at 4 a.m. I quickly learned why after fishing around in his crib for his Nuk, only to sweep my hand through a puddle of vomit. So he spent much of that morning in bed with us throwing up into a bowl. Then, I gave him the presents I bought for him in Arizona. Look how excited he looks. My sad little cowboy.

(I still don't know why my photos are sideways -- my resident geek can't figure it out either.)

The vomiting on Monday quickly turned to diarrhea on Tuesday and all the poor boy could do was lie on the couch and moan (and go diarrhea). Ed had the genius idea to double up the diapers with a cloth one inside the disposable diaper. This is why I married the man, people!

The diarrhea continued through the week and our little boy was weak and listless -- he wouldn't even crack a smile. It was very scary. I debated taking him into the doctor knowing full well they'd tell me it was just a virus and it had to pass. I made a call to the nurse who told me they had been seeing a lot of this particular virus that can last a week or longer. They've seen a lot of cramping too which would explain his moaning.

He hadn't been able to eat or drink anything all week. Then suddenly, Friday night we were lying on the bed talking about the Children's Museum. I reminded him about the little penny machine and how it squashed the pennies like a pancake. Before the word even got out of my mouth he said, "Pancake. I want a pancake!" Since he had suggested things before that he might eat and changed his mind, I offered, "How about a waffle." He agreed so we went downstairs and he ate HALF a waffle. Then when he was finished, he ate the other half! It was a MIRACLE WAFFLE. I'll spare you the details of what happened next but let's just say, I'll never look at our green towels the same way. But after that, it was like he was cured. He's little by little getting better. And yesterday, he actually moved off the couch.

He's now entered into a very grumpy phase so he's not entirely himself yet. We're not used to having a grumpy kid -- we don't know what to do with him. At one point he was crabbing and crying and we said, "You're being Mr. Grumps -- we want Mr. Happy back." And as he choked back his tears, he cried, "I AM MR. HAPPY!"

riverboat

Today, while pushing Raisin around the shopping cart at the store, he kept saying what I thought was, "I want to go on a river boat." I quickly assumed it was something our pal Calliou said (or whined) in some episode where Calliou imagined he was involved in some elaborate riverboat gambling drama. So, I said what any good mother would say, "Mmm, hmm. A riverboat? That's nice." He looked a little frustrated and tried to annunciate a little more. "Yep. Got it...a riverboat. I wish we could go on a riverboat too." Finally, as we approached the checkout lane, he said it again. "I want to put it on the conveyor belt!"

River boat, conveyor belt -- it's all the same.

Stupid mama.

a boy and his (reluctant) dog

He is not amused.

little mr. sunshine

Okay, now I got my pictures to post, but they're posting like this:

it's always a good idea to wash your hands before eating

operation calliou phase-out

The little boy has grown quite fond of the show Calliou. And quite frankly, that Calliou kid can be a whiney little brat. The first few episodes we watched seemed innocent enough. But then the whining started.

And you know how they say that kids are very influenced by television? By golly, they're right! Ever since Elian saw the episode where Calliou expressed his displeasure in something by saying, "I don't like (INSERT WHATEVER CALLIOU DIDN'T LIKE HERE)!!!" he's decided he doesn't like, well, pretty much EVERYTHING!!

Sure, we've picked up a few good things from the show and have used them to our advantage. Like the episode where Lucky the horse eats some carrots. "Hey buddy, why don't you try to eat some of your carrots like Lucky..." (munch, munch, munch). And there's this one, "Calliou sleeps like a big boy -- I bet you can sleep like a big boy too!"

But it seems like the bad is outweighing the good so we've decided to cut him off. We're trying to phase him out gradually so he doesn't notice. We try to give the other shows we've saved on TIVO the hard sell, "How about Bob the Builder?... or Clifford the Big Red Dog...or what about CURIOUS GEORGE -- I wonder what antics that crazy monkey's up to today..." Usually it works. Usually.

We anticipate Operation Calliou Phase-out to be complete in a few weeks.

please stand by

I've been experiencing technical difficulties with Blogger. I can't seem to post a picture to save my life. Crap.

their aim's going to have to get a lot better before I move to the suburbs

We're in the process of getting new windows installed upstairs. The other day the window guy had this to report:

Window Guy: "Do you know that you have a little hole in your siding?"

Me: (thinking) "Oh, please don't be termites... please don't be termites" (note: we have aluminum siding)

Window Guy: "Yeah, it's a very small hole."

Me: (thinking) "Oh crap, it's mice...yes, special aluminum burrowing mice..."

Window Guy: "I hate to be the one to tell you guys this..."

Me: (thinking) "No wait, it's carpenter ants...We've got carpenter ants!!!"

Window Guy: "...but I know a lot about guns and ammunition and I'm pretty sure it's a bullet hole. Probably a 45 millimeter shotgun"

Me: (thinking) "PHEW!!! It's only a bullet hole."

hide and seek EXTREME

Lately little e has been enjoying the game of hide and seek. He likes to be the seeker. And when he's the seeker, you can count on having about three seconds max to hide. So finding and assuming your hiding position can be a dangerous challenge to say the least. I've pleaded with him to get him to count longer with a "Buddy, count SLOWLY -- count up to 10." Which usually results in a, "one...two...TEN!!" I know very well he can count to ten. So I suspect this is one of his many cheating tactics. Along with that part where he uncovers his eyes and watches me hide. It's not enough that I only have a nanosecond to do it. Then, there's Norman who works as his partner in crime. So in the event that I have managed to make it to a good hiding spot, the dog immediately reveals where I am.

In other news, someone seems to have lost interest in potty training. But I'm not going to mention any names.

we have TINKLE!!

We've been "practicing" on the potty lately and so far we've had three successful sittings.

The first time happened when Ed was in New York. As Elian sat on the potty, I sat on the bathtub and we just chatted. As he sat there and concentrated, it started to drip, drip, drip out. He said, "I did it mama!!" We both started laughing because we were so excited. Then he yelled, "Get a lollipop!" (I'd promised him one once he tinkled on the potty). So he sat on the bed and enjoyed his reward repeating over and over what I had told him, "tell papa all about it... Papa going to be so proud of you..."

The second time, he did it right before Ed was about to give him a bath. I'm so glad papa got to experience one of the early monumental ones. Apparently, this time it was more than a trickle, it was an actual stream. He was so excited, he made Ed carry him downstairs to tell me and we all shared a family hug/kiss session (we're gay that way).

The third time, it happened much the same as the first. Only this time with every dribble he got out, he would lean over and hug me with this giant smile on his face. It was the best thing ever.

I'm trying not to get too excited because as I understand it, this can happen then they can completely lose interest. The bribery has now evolved into two chocolate chips for every tinkle on the potty. Who wouldn't go tinkle on the potty for two chocolate chips? Did I mention it's Ghirardelli chocolate??

schoolhouse rock

Because of the little man's newfound appreciation of punctuation, I pulled out the Schoolhouse Rock DVD I received from a friend a while back. He was too young to appreciate it when he got it. But then I remembered the "Interjections" ditty from my childhood and how it was chockfull of exclamation points.

It didn't disappoint. The boy loves it. In fact, now we have this new little duet where we sing.

US: So when you're happy...
HIM: HOORAY!

US: Or sad...
HIM: Awww.

US: Or frightened...
HIM: EEK!

US: Or mad...
HIM: RATS!

US: Or excited...
HIM: WOW!

US: Or glad...
HIM: HEY!

...An interjection starts the sentence right!!!!

It's great fun. The best part is hearing him join in when they sing "Alleluia, Alleluia!" as the TV screen fills with exclamation points.

quote of the day (and quite possibly the saddest thing ever)

Last night:

"I need new Nukkie. This one has tears on it."

punctuation geek

Our son has developed a strange obsession with punctuation. It's not like we tried to teach it to him -- it happened by accident. One night before bed we were reading our "Family Car Songbook" (actual title) which had become a pretty regular staple in the before-bed ritual. He enjoyed hearing us sing the songs and would join in whenever he felt like it. That was before his puctuation obsession.

Then he noticed the song titles in big bold letters across the top of the pages and one night asked,
"What's this Mama?"
"It's a comma."
"What's this?"
"That's an apostrophe."

So now, every night, instead of reading stories, or even singing songs, he selects the book based on how much punctuation it has. He can now identify a period, a comma, an apostrophe, an exclamation point, a hyphen, a question mark, parentheses and just yesterday I heard this:

"MAMA COME HERE! AN ELLIPSIS!!!"
Low and behold, there it was in all its glory...the ellipsis.

He is so going to get beat up one day.

and just so you know

Blogging isn't as much fun on dialup. We've been without DSL since Tuesday. My IT guy (Ed) is stumped. I'm ready to start the cave drawings.

if this keeps up, hello nba

We had the little man's two-year checkup the other day.

height: 90th percentile
weight: 25th percentile
head: 75th percentile (that would be the schulz genes)

and they continued to sing happy birthday every day until the last of the soccer ball cake was eaten

mauphesis!

A few weeks ago, Elian woke up from his nap crying, clearly disturbed as if he had had a bad nightmare. I asked him if he was thinking about something scary and he said, yes, "Mauphesis. Crib."

Generally I can understand about 89% of what the boy says. But this Mauphesis, I had no idea. So throughout the day I probed. "Buddy, what is Mauphesis?" I just wanted to rule out that there were mice scurrying around in his crib with him. The more I asked, the sillier looks and responses I got. He would point at anything and say, "Mauphesis."

Fast forward to a few days ago. He wakes up from his nap. I go in his room to find him seated holding his two Targets he fell asleep with. As I approached the crib, he tossed both Targets into the air and yelled, "MAUPHESIS!!!!!" and began laughing very hard.

Whatever mauphesis is, it is no longer scary. It has since become a big part of his comic routine.

how to eat a donut

art

Title: A Boy and His Hair
Medium: Play-Doh
Artist: Papa

quote of the day

(While changing diaper.)

"I love big pee-pees!"

And, just in case we didn't hear him the first time. "I LOVE big pee-pees! I LOVE big pee-pees!"

Not knowing what to say to that, I finally replied, "Yes, what's not to love about them?"

"gaga boing-bock"

This is something our little man enjoys saying these days.

choo choo

I think when our little boy was picking out his parents, he didn't know he was getting a mama who was completely devoid of any brain for the putting together of train tracks. Somehow I can never get the two ends to connect. However, I can make a mean figure eight track. And I'm pretty good at a waggle waggle (curvy track with no connection) or ski-jump-style track that inevitably results in an unfortunate train wreck. Lucky for him, his father seems to have no problem. See this track that they made this morning? With all its bridges and criss crosses?

Show off.

P.S. This is my 200th post -- yeay for me!

with special guest appearance by leo!

Our boy has yet another character to add to his cast of thousands. His name is Leo. Leo is a clumsy little fellow who, after he takes a spill, needs much love and attention from his mama. This usually involves some sort of pratfall followed by a "Leo has owie." That's my cue to pick him up and let him rest his head on my shoulder while I say, "Poor Leo..." I'm not ashamed to admit it, I like this Leo kid. I get lots of cuddles out of him. In fact, I enjoy Leo almost as much as Rosie.

Christmas guilt

Each one of these adorable handcrafted puppets was lovingly crafted by our next-door neighbor for our son. The very same neighbors also brought over a variety of homemade treats and a poinsettia for us. Yeah, I'm going to feel pretty bad when that privacy fence goes up.

yesterday's quote of the day

(Overheard while coloring.)
E-L-I-A-N spells Elian.

a very special hernan-dos

After a very scary coughing spell, Ed took Elian to the ER Monday night. I really thought my child was dying. We were going to take him in earlier, but then it seemed like he was feeling a little better. A check-over, chest xray and nebulizer later, they told Ed it was just a virus -- a very nasty virus.

Fast forward to Wednesday. One of the times Elian wakes up in the middle of the night to cry and tell us how much pain he's in, for some odd reason I decide to feel his glands on his neck. They were HUGE. So Ed gets a nurse on the horn. The nurse tells us we should either bring him into the emergency room or to the doctor first thing in the morning. Since Ed and Elian had spent a good 4 1/2 hours at the ER just two nights ago, we figured it wouldn't get him care much earlier considering it was already midnight or so.

So the next morning I took him into the doctor. Our doctor wasn't available so we went to a nurse practitioner. I usually love nurse practitioners. But this one, not so much. I think it may have been her first day on the job. After I told her the whole horror story about the ER and the glands, she looks him over and tells me it's probably just a virus, that he should be better in just a couple days. "Um, don't you want to check his glands?" I ask. "Ooohhhh, his GLANDS." She then tells me again that it's probably just a virus she's going to prescribe some kind of magic mouthwash. I start to probe her about other tests she could do and she mentions a throat culture. "But it's very rare for someone his age to have strep throat..." She goes to consult with a physician. Then she comes back and just in case I didn't quite understand before explains, "Yes, he says that strep throat is very uncommon in children his age and that a throat culture probably isn't necessary." That's when I asked for the throat culture. "He's not going to like it," she says, as if he's thoroughly enjoyed the experience up to that point. "Oh, I know," I say. "He might throw up," she says. "I'm ready," I say. For some reason, she really didn't want to give him this throat culture. And the more she didn't want to, the more I wanted her to. So she does it. He cries for about 1/2 a minute. We leave. Shortly after we get home, the nurse practitioner calls. "Um, I got the lab results from the throat culture. And it's positive."

So now our little boy's been on antibiotics since yesterday. And all I can say is that I'm very thankful. I just felt so helpless watching him cry in pain. All we could do is squirt Tylenol and Motrin down his throat every few hours. I can't even imagine what it's like for parents who have a child with a chronic illness because my heart was ripped apart five times over through this ordeal.

Moral of the story: Trust your mommy instincts.

roll the clip

The little man received another Christmas gift in the form of a big ol' nasty virus. So this video clip pretty much sums up what we've been doing the past 4-5 days. No, it really isn't a photo.

Note: The number of Targets (Uglidolls) he needs, is inversely proportionate to how well he is feeling.